‘I Aint Sorry’: I’m Done Apologising!
Guys we are midway through the year and for me this marks the last 6 months of my 20s. Oopsie now you all know my age! If I could rewind the last ten years I would have told the younger me to stop apologising. Growing up we were always told to apologise for everything even when it wasn’t our fault. I’m done apologising but if you still need more convincing then I’m sure Queen Bey got this.
1. Telling Human Kind No
As I approach the big 3-0, I have made a choice to not to have anyone waste my time. Its a new era and its way too precious. I am more particular about who I spend my time with and what I work on and I ain’t sorry about it. Learning to say No has been extremely difficult for me and now that I am getting the hang of it I am not stopping. Its important that I spend my days wisely in this new chapter of my life so if it does not edify me I am not wasting a minute on it.
2. Letting Old Friends Go
A year ago I thought because I had known some people for a long time I had to be loyal. Ha! Sometimes the season is past and its okay to move on. We can still love them but from a distance. If people are not contributing to your growth or are toxic then its fine to let go and not be sorry about it either.
3. No Filter
For the longest time I was sensitive towards others to the extent that I would be scared to confidently speak my mind. Its ok for me (and you) to speak our mind without worrying about who is going to be offended by it. Growing up means our outlook on life will slightly change and those values we once held are also altered. This means a few people are not going to be comfortable with the new you and that’s okay. Do not allow anyone to silence you or have you living life according to their standards.
4. Getting Professional Help
Its unrealistic to be ‘fine’ all the time, and for most Africans seeking professional help is a huge no-no. I have decided to be honest with myself and realise the battles I am fighting cannot be won when I am solo. The rug under my feet has been pulled off of me enough times and in those moments that I am falling apart I have realised Its okay for me to get help. Getting help is beneficial to both my inner and outer man so I ain’t sorry about what helps me become a better person.
5. Cancelling on Anyone for some much needed Me-time.
There are those moments when I feel like my hangout plan should just cancel. A clear indication that I really don’t wanna go and probably shouldn’t have made those plans. I am not going to feel bad about taking care of me and pulling out of any social engagements. Its okay to be honest with yourself and be all the company you need. Grab some popcorn and wine and have an Olivia Pope kinda night.
6. Being about What’s mine.
Following your dreams means being around certain people a lot less. There’s nothing wrong with being committed to the hustle and going after what you want in life. If people chose to respect my grind then kudos and its all love and those that feel some typa way about it then oh well. The hustle continues.
7. Break The Bank
You know what, I’m tryna get my life together but that don’t mean I cannot spoil myself. I am going on those trips, they been on my bucket list for too long, I’m definitely going to spend my hard earned coins to get the high-end shoes I been eyeing for a minute. I am going to be spontaneous and live my life the way I want. Will be saving along the way tho.
8. Being Broke
There are times when I have forced myself to go on coffee dates and link up with people with my last coins. I aint sorry about being broke and I am done going out of my way to force situations when my wallet is yelling No. It’s fine for me to walk up to the cashier not knowing if my card will go through because I have paid my bills and taken care of whats important. I will not be dipping into my saving just so I can save face, I’m tryna have kids some day and I don’t wanna be calling anyone asking for money for diapers so I ain’t sorry.
9. Crashing on anyone’s couch
Moving back home even. Rent is real guys and a few months break from that stress is not embarrassing at all. One of my favorite bloggers spent a year sleeping on someone’s couch before her big break and there is nothing wrong with getting a little help along the way. Its okay to try something out and it not work out as planned. Moving in with your people can be the best solution to get you back on your feet and I am not apologising for it.
10. Not Settling
The twenties were about me experimenting and learning things the hard way. I know what I want and it may seem as if my standards are too high but guess what? Its what I want so I ain’t sorry about it. I know my worth and will honor myself by not by not compromising.
Hello 30s, I await your arrival and the new me is already protecting her dreams, body, feelings and everything that embodies me. I am not apologising anymore and I hope everyone out there finds that confidence from within to be who they are without worrying about anyone else.